3 types of pregnant women

I have come to the conclusion that there are three basic types of pregnant women. The first are the ones who are fertile myrtles and have no idea what it is like to struggle to have a baby. They have no understanding or respect really for the feelings of an infertile woman. The second type are the ones who don't necessarily have a hard time getting pregnant, but do have to try a bit harder than the type one women and are more understanding of infertile women. Then there are the ones who struggle for years to conceive. They understand the pain that each pregnancy announcement and "baby bump" picture brings. Unfortunately I will be like the type three women once, if ever, I am finally able to conceive.

The majority of my "friends" are type one. They are pregnant almost as soon as they start to try to have a baby. I don't really think of them as real friends because they only talk to me when they need something or want to vent their frustrations/misery to someone. They don't know if something is safe during pregnancy and they don't trust their doctor (which is another story all together); they have no problem coming to me because I'm a nurse so I must know. They also think that there is nothing wrong with coming to me to complain about their pregnancy symptoms (i.e. how much their boobs hurts or how sick they are or how much weight they have gained) and how overbearing their husbands are. Plus don't think when they talk about how much caffeine they have because they are "so tired." Are you kidding me?!? Do you know how bad caffeine is for the baby?!? I'm sure that they don't mean to cause pain, but if all you ever talk about is your pregnancy/baby it hurts. I'm sure other women who have struggled or are struggling with infertility will understand.

Then there are the women who have had to actually try to get pregnant. While they don't have the diagnosis of infertility, it does take them several months to get pregnant. These women are more understanding of what it feels like to not be able to conceive right away. They, on average, are more likely to make healthy options for themselves and the baby. They take the nausea and fatigue in stride and just accept that it is part of growing a human inside of you. You rarely hear them complain about their pregnancy and when you do it's cause for concern because it really is something wrong. They do lots of research on their own about what is best for the baby and what is not. When you talk to them not everything revolves around them and their pregnancy. You talk about the latest news, the crazy weather in Alaska, your dog, their daughter, both of your husband’s jobs, anything and everything and you feel like they truly care about you as a person! They know that they can come to you to ask questions related to their pregnancy and you will gladly help them. However, they also take the time to ask how you are doing, how the whole infertility thing is going and tell you that if it gets too much for you to let them know. I'm so lucky that my neighbor, Crystal, is this way! Unfortunately they are scheduled to move in April and I will miss chatting outside while the kids and dog play.

Finally there are the women who have struggled and beat infertility. Ok, so maybe beat isn't the right word but it's the best I could think of. These women totally get it. They know how much of a miracle a pregnancy and baby are and are so thankful to be where they are. I used to work in an OB/Gyn clinic and we had a patient who found out she was pregnant in our office and immediately broke down. Turns out she and her husband had been trying for 8 years to have a child of their own and had finally just given up. At her first appointment with the OB provider she told us that not only was she really nauseated at the time, but that she got so violently ill one night that she ruptured a blood vessel on her temple. However, she didn't complain. She just smiled and said that it didn't matter because she was so thankful to have this baby. She was a huge sore of hope and inspiration to me personally. She is coming up on her due date soon and I'm sad that I no longer work there so I won't get to see her baby.