A bit of a change

Initally we planned for our blog to be a way to keep our family up to date with everything going in our crazy adventure called life while we live in Alaska and where ever else the Army sends us. However, we quickly discovered that one: our life is boring and two: we have other means to keeping in touch with our families. However, I have decided to take this over as more of an outlet for my thoughts. I'm an open person and don't hesitate to share what's going on with others. Here's a hopefully short summary of what's weighing on my mind lately.

Right before he left for basic training in April 2010, we decided that it was time for me to go off birth control. We had been married for 15 months, wanted to have children, and knew he was about to leave for at least 3 months. Well, during the inital 8 weeks of basic training we both discovered that we were ready to try to start out family. He ended up getting injured in basic and sent home for convalesant leave and we "worked" like crazy to start our family that month. Unfortunately that didn't work, and was just the start of our story. We were finally reunited in Alaska, of all places, and tried for another 4 months or so with no success. Then came the dreaded year long deployment to Afghanistan. Unfortunately the deployement was no uneventful. He was involved in an IED accident. Thank the Lord he wasn't harmed really badly, but did injure his knee and groin. He's now been home for almost a year and still no children for us. We finally got a referred for infertility testing back in October. Finally I thought...we'll get some answers. Boy was I wrong! All we really found out was that I'm normal/healthy and he has low count, but my dr won't do anything for him and can't refer him until he has 2 SA's done and they can only be done every 3 months! So began the journey that has taught me that I have no patience! We did our first round of treatments in December 2012. I took clomid and then had to cancel the IUI for that month because I ovulated on my own. Then in January I took clomid again and ended up getting to have the IUI done. Unfortunately, due to stress and anxiety on him we had a horrible sample, which ended up also being a blessing. It showed my dr how big our problem was and got the repeat SA done. During the 3 months waiting for that I put him on all kinds of vitamins and supplements. His count did come up significantly, but was still low so he is finally getting referred to a doctor to examine everything. I'm so happy about that because no one had done any real exam on that since the IED! He leaves next week for that fun adventure. I'm super jealous about that though because he gets to go down to Washington!! So jealous of that! We had our second IUI done on Sunday and I'm going crazy waiting. I wish there was a way to find out sooner than 14 days if it worked or not.

So that didn't turn out to be a short summary really, but oh well. I never thought about infertility, especially being so young. I always thought that it only occured with older women. I have struggled a lot with our infertiility wondering why it was happening to us, if I was supposed to be a mom at all, am I just supposed to adopt children...and many many more questions. I am being forced to learn to be patient, and have really developed a new love and respect for my husband. This whole experience has definitely put a strain on our marriage at times, espeically while I'm taking Clomid, but he has stood by me and supported me the entire time. I could not have asked for a better partner to go through life with!